Some Vacation that Turned Out to Be.

It's been almost 3 months since my last post and while I thought that maybe there wasn't too much left to say about being transgendered, after two years living this new life I realized, boy was I ever wrong.
I'm not sure where to start to describe the roller-coaster ride that has been summer '12  but I've come to realize that being a trans man is going to shape my life more than I had initially anticipated.

Remember all those posts about being "discovered", the paranoia I had that someone would find out my secret. Well I'm pretty much over that. While I don't run around waving a transgender or queer flag, I am WAY less concerned about what people think. That frankly, is none of my business. As Popeye would say: I yam what I yam and most days that's good enough.

T really does have its perks, one being the increased metabolism. While my grocery bill is a bit higher since i am eating more than I used to, I am also enjoying the increased body temperature – no more cold feet! I rode my bike to work all summer after making a pact with myslef that I'd ride more days than I drove and i discovered how much I missed the freedom of a bike. I used to ride everywhere when I was a kid and I'd forgotten about the great feeling of the wind in your hair and the smell of the air away from the street. As a result of biking and kayaking almost every day over the summer I ended up having to buy a bunch of new clothes because I reshaped my body in just a few short months. My waist and hips are now narrower than my shoulders and I have trimmed off a good deal of extra chubb I kept complaining about last year. I can't be certain it will stay off over the winter but a little extra insulation at 40 below is not a bad thing.

Two years and four months is where I'm at now and I am feeling great about how I look. I still can't get over what a difference top surgery has made to my mental state. I imagine it is the same way a depressed person feels after finally being treated with Prozac. My mood seems to have stabilized for the most part which is a really nice change. I hope that after my hysterectomy any accidental or incidental estrogen induced mood fluctuations will be done. I'm not entirely sure yet when surgery might happen but I am definitely looking forward to getting it over with! More on the fun medical politics topic later.

Early in the summer I met a trans guy looking to move north. I offered him a safe and supportive place to stay and things looked like they were going well, but then it all fell apart. I'm not sure exactly what happened but within about 3 weeks of getting here, he decided to go back in the closet after more than a year of living as his true self. I was really disappointed and angry and for a while I had a really hard time dealing with his decision to quit his transition. That led to a lot of drama around my house this summer, some of which I will tell you about in the near future.

Life was not all controversy and drama, thank goodness and there is lots to celebrate and be thankful for so keep checking in to see what's up with the TransCanada Coyote!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

great- you are back!