8.28.2011

Eight Weeks Post-Surgery

Eight weeks have passed since I had my breasts removed and every day I am thankful they are finally gone. I have hated them since they started growing like tumors in the 4th grade. They always made me feel awkward and I had an incredible amount of dysphoria related to them. The past two months without them  has been incredible. I love how I look in my dress shirts. I love how I look in my t-shirts. I love that I can wear a muscle shirt and a pair of jeans and not feel awkward. I love that my chest is flat. I love that it doesn't bounce when I run or wobble when I walk up stairs or jiggle when I laugh. It doesn't hurt once a month and doesn't swell up when I don't eat properly. I don't have sore shoulders from wearing a bra. I don't have chest pain and difficulty breathing from wearing a binder....or two even.  And no one is looking at my chest anymore unless I am walking around with out a shirt on. Since I only do that at home the only ones that ever stare are the cats and I'm pretty sure they don't give a damn.

I have become pretty lazy with the oil and vitamin E cream but I am trying to get back into the routine of massaging the scar tissue and applying the bio oil before bed. I am still a little concerned with the right side since it is quite a bit "looser" than the left. I am really happy with how the left side looks but I am concerned I lost quite a bit of nipple and a lot of what at first appears to be "areola" is actually scar tissue. If the scar tissue fades to white I will have to get the rest tattooed on which is no big deal I guess. I still have hopes that the right side will settle down and smooth out. I am going to start working out the pec muscles a bit and see if the dog ears and skin will tighten up and smooth out. The shooting pains are mostly gone except when I massage the scars but once they fade I am sure they will hardly be noticeable. In other news the fur is coming. Hairs area appearing around the nipple area and the pecs are getting fuzzy....looks like I'll get at least some chest hair which I am now totally stoked for.....almost as much as the slowest moustache ever.

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