I went to a family gathering this past weekend and saw a lot of family members I haven't got a chance to visit with for a very long time. I was trying my best not to panic and freak out and get all paranoid like I have been lately and just went into it hoping for the best. I haven't seen any of my family since I started T almost a year ago.
My family always surprises me. I was so honoured that most of them have accepted my transition and after one or two little bumps and few missed pronouns everyone seemed to deal with it most graciously. My 90 year old grandma didn't miss a beat with the male pronouns and name change. I can't even tell you how awesome she is. That little effort showed me how much she loves me.
My cousins and aunts and uncles were so amazing. I got to have conversations about my job, my art, and life in general. I get to find out what everyone was up to, whether they had gone back to school, were getting close to retirement, or trying to decide who they were going to cheer for in the playoffs. I was nice to reconnect with people who could still recognize me in my new body and not be preoccupied with questions about surgery, genitals, or hormone therapy. It was so wonderful to have a safe and comfortable place just to be me if only for a few hours.
Being away from home has made me more self-reliant and more confident in my identity. I suppose that is partly because of all the time I have spent thinking about what it is to be me. I know who I am now more than ever and I am never going to compromise that again. I am finally feeling at home in my body and after surgery I am confident I will finally feel balanced and at peace. The life I have always wanted is finally beginning and as the pieces come together the comfort and satisfaction of my simple life will be upon me sooner than later.